Friday, November 25, 2005

Can we be friends?

The worst thing one can ever do to a friendship is, turn it into a romantic relationship.

Why is it that two FRIENDS, who completely and genuinely understand each other, boast about having similar frequencies and mind sets, who forgive each others faults and errors instantly and ungrudgingly, love spending time with each other, who believe in a hassle free life, overnight, turn into each others nightmares, as soon as they utter these words- “Lets take this a step further and get into a relationship”?

Every single day is a challenge, after this. Every meeting, ends with a fight and the next one has to start with where you left off. There is absolutely no room for error. Oh boy, one single word can explode into a world war scale fight, followed by weeks of Cold war, ofcourse. Nothing you do or say is right. And as if the Gods are against this union, every single thing you do or say somehow, IS going to turn out wrong, it’s a given!

What is it about ‘relationships’ that makes these perfectly harmonious adults turn into abusive, possessive, expectational, irrational, insensitive, uncommunicable, pain in the arses?
What makes two intelligent, considerate and loving ADULTS, act so inhumanely towards each other? (Nat Geo are u reading this?)

And finally when you decide to give all this pain and anguish a break and decide to break up and move on, what comes next? More pain!
Nothing is as painful, not even a root canal, compared to getting over some one. It doesn’t matter if you just knew the person for a month or a decade it hurts just as much. And then starts the routine of doubts, denial, self-pity, confusion, optimism and hope. And just when you think you have forgotten that someone and you are ready to move on, just when you have decided that you have learnt from your mistakes and swear to consider all men and women as your brothers and sisters, you meet Mr.Right (#12453) and the whole cycle repeats.

Is it really worth the trouble?

What is wrong with being ‘just friends’?

What is wrong with staying uncommitted?

What is wrong in investing all that time, energy, patience and money, into family, friends, work and the future?

What is wrong with staying single?

A piece of advice, never turn you friend into your boyfriend, unless that’s the last time you expect to see him, as a good friend!




PS: The gyan and related bullshit, that I had gathered over ‘why a relationship doesn’t work’, has been intentionally omitted, because nothing beats learning from your own mistakes. So happy f****in-up your life!

5 Comments:

At 12:31 AM, Anonymous saj said...

Lyn,

I love you for this entry. Recently I wrote about this in my blog ( http://www.xanga.com/boogley/387738279/can-my-friend-be-my-lover.html ).

I wanted to ask the same questions.

What is wrong with being ‘just friends’?

What is wrong with staying uncommitted?

It's not necessary that all male-female friendship ends up in love.

I can't really explain... but all I can say is ..I really appreciate this entry!

Sincerely,
Saj

 
At 5:04 PM, Anonymous VK said...

its because as long as u r friends...u hide behind the facede of friendship...but once u decide to cross that thin line, u get into the other territory. And all hell breaks loose...confusion...commotion...chaos...pain...tears...misfortune..everything follows....its is really a wonder !!!

 
At 9:12 AM, Blogger naveen said...

Why cant people in a relationship be friends? Am I confused or am I missing something?

 
At 12:38 AM, Blogger L*J said...

To all :)

 
At 5:12 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

good one ,,,
some thing i am confused of

 

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